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November 27, 2007 |
Contact: John Barnes |
Good News: Despite Mayor's Claims, Santa Is Safe Says Recent Study
Seattle - In an open letter to Santa last week and a speech to children at Seattle's Annual Christmas tree lighting ceremony at Westlake Center, Seattle Mayor Greg Nickels last week offered a Grinch-like tone, grumbling about climate change threatening Santa, telling kids "I hope the reindeer can swim," and blaming them and their energy-sucking video games for melting Arctic ice.
As Nickels spoke, his assistants handed out stickers admonishing the crowd to "Save Santa." In the true spirit of the season, however, good news has appeared that will save Santa and Christmas!
A study released earlier this month by NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory and led by a UW expert found that natural, cyclical factors were the likely cause of changes in the ice pack. Further, there have been recent indications that the trend in Arctic ice pack may be changing or unrelated to man-made greenhouse gases.
University of Washington researcher James Morison commented in the JPL press release that, "Our study confirms many changes seen in upper Arctic Ocean circulation in the 1990s were mostly decadal in nature, rather than trends caused by global warming."
"Ho, ho, ho! It is good to know that I will be safe at the North Pole for many years to come," said a jolly Father Christmas. "As for whether Seattle is naughty or nice, I can't say since I am not welcome at the airport and am unable to visit."
Santa was also pleased to hear that, despite Al Gore's claims to the contrary, ice at the South Pole is actually increasing, leaving options for relocation open.
Not all the news is good for St. Nick, however.
Recent studies show that if greenhouse gases are, in fact, having an impact on the Arctic ice, Santa may not have anybody to blame but himself. According to the Norwegian newspaper Aftenposten, the methane (a powerful greenhouse gas) released from one moose each year can equal the carbon footprint of a car traveling more than 8,000 miles. Moose and reindeer are both members of the Odocoilinae family. With eight reindeer, Rudolph and their associated families, Santa's team may be emitting more greenhouse gases than the Mayor's SUV and Al Gore's home combined.
"I am more than 1,700 years old and I have seen temperatures change and politicians come and go," said the jolly old elf. "Using children for politics, though, is sure to put one boy on the naughty list."